Thursday, October 11, 2007

in lieu of anything interesting

And there I was about to stuff Daniel in a box and post him to some obscure European country, when "I know!", I thought to myself, "I'll go to the gym, work off my angst, and let someone else entertain him (for that's what he needs, is entertainment. It's a pattern, I've come to realise, that by Thursday he's all used to having several adults keep him amused all day, and by that same time, I'm still in that disconnect-from-child mode that occurs when he's been away from me for two whole days, and then we drive each other nuts. All morning he's been wawawa, and I've been "No idea, dude. Have you thought about putting a cork in it?" The more I'm with him, ie from Saturday until Tuesday we go with no break AT ALL from each other, the more calm I become and the less wawawaing he does)


Oh yeah, the gym.

The creche! WAS CLOSED!

Frikkin' school holidays.

Fortunately there's a carpenter here at present fixing some door handles, and instead of driving me nuts, Daniel is driving him nuts.


Actually, the futile walk to the gym and back (with Daniel grousing the ENTIRE time), was enough to have me feeling more able to deal with him wishing I was FUN! like all his day care workers are, and have reconnected with my inner earth mother so at this point, he could probably grizzle into next week and I'd be all "that's fine darling, it's my pleasure to listen to you and try and work out a passable solution to your angst. Which isn't annoying me at all.".


I'm unexercised. The rest of that was just me failing to get to the point.

We'll head out this afternoon too, and go to the to the Salvos store for a quick squizz. I was there on Tuesday, which is also 20% off day, wahoo! etc, and there was this plastic slippery dip for twenty bucks, making it only sixteen smackeroos if I bought it. No way could I get it home though without paying an additional thirty bucks for a trailer though, so I called Strep, or as I like to think of him at times like this, The man With The Free Trailer. He didn't answer though and when he returned my call, I was halfway home and in no mood to head back and buy the stupid thing so he could pick it up for us on Saturday. Which he said he could do. So I went back there yesterday instead, fully prepared to pay the WHOLE 20 bucks needed to buy it on non pension day Tuesday, but some fucker had bought it already.


But we'll head back there today because I yam lame and what else are we going to do on a sunny Thursday afternoon except....walk and shop? To me, it's a great combination: exercise and bargain hunting all at once, but for him? Poor kid, his earliest memories will be of mommy getting all excited about shirts! Costing $5.75!

He's disappeared into the bathroom doorway with his crayon and a big scrap book, and is sitting at the carpenter's feet drawing.

I think he needs him some good male bonding.

The carpenter is doing an awesome job of looking after him while I give you the live updates. He thinks I'm working so if anyone asks, you're my boss, okay.

And now, in lieu of any interesting conversation, bee productions brings you another episode of Product Review Time.

up your nose with a plastic bottle thingy, yo'

The FLO Sinus Care starter kit. I have no idea if this thing is international but I'm sure anyone actually taking notice of this has access to something similar should the need arise.

That being said, my god, I'd marry this thing. Or I would if I didn't think that in marrying it, it'd eventually stop contributing to the upkeep of our currently awesome relationship, a relationship it contributes to on a daily basis, what with us not being married and so, not legally bound to each other, meaning, if it didn't make the effort, I might just choose to walk away. I, obviously contribute equally, but if I married it, I can't be sure I wouldn't get complacent too, and rely on the legal document to keep the romance alive. So if we got married,our relationship would eventually go to shit.

But theoretically at least, I love this kit enough to marry it, if I indeed believed in the state telling me who I live with and and whether or not I continue to live with them.


You know how I've been tossing handfuls of over the counter drugs down my throat in an effort to quell the constant supply of ick my sinuses have been producing? Well, shiver my timbers and tickle my grandmother, but one or two days of using this twice a day, and I shit you not, my sinuses, they SING.

Of course, if I actually used the kit as often as recommended by the chemisty person, I'd be even better. But it's been so bad for so long that at this point, using the kit as infrequently as I do, I still feel FABULOUS! even though by any one else's standards, maybe I'm still a bit congested.

You actually really do shove the nozzle of that big assed bottle right up yer shnoz, and you actually really do squirt gallons of water right up there so that IT COMES OUT THE OTHER SIDE OH MY GOD, but you know? It actually really feels good.

I wish I'd known about this for years because I've long squirted home made salt water up my nose when I get a sinus infection, and while it feels like HELL, it does get the job done so fast that you're all goggle eyed and "what infection?" about five minutes later. As mentioned, it feels like HELL though, and it hurts like a mofo, which is why I reserve the special kind of nasal love for crisis situations only.

This kit? Does not hurt. It's not even unpleasant. Weird, surely, and one does have to circle the loaded bottle while keeping a suspicious eye on it the first time one uses it, what with one's experience of salt up the nose being a form of TORTURE.

Once it's done though, and it didn't hurt and one can actually BREATHE for the first time since Spring hinted at springing, one is all "man, I wish I'd known about this kind of loving YEARS AGO".

I'm going to keep using this baby even when my hayfever isn't hating me with a vengeance, because...I don't know. I'm weird?


and because I'm not good with change, I HATE the new doorknob on the bathroom door. The other door handles are delightful, which is why I LIED and said the bathroom door handle is fucked up too, when it wasn't, and I'm being punished now because he gave me a knob not a handle (porny?) and, yes, HATE.

my pretty

shiny, pretty, LOVE


Burning hate.

and look, it's even got the outline of the old perfectly functional but not as pretty as the new handles, which is why the LIE that got me into this door knob hell in the first place.

"Mr Man" I asked, "can I have my old door handle back?" thinking I could live with the bronze, not pretty, but not fucking ugly door handle this big knob replaced.

"Sorry" he replied, "No. I drilled a huge assed hole in your door so that the Big Knob would fit, and now nothing else but that ugly fucker will fit into your door."

And he was genuinely sorry so now I feel bad for not telling him I love his work, all of it.

ngiwhnrtiwhpchfig2h;vqcg m[obwihp; <- me, banging my head on the keyboard, because it's not just the door handle that's a knob.

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