Saturday, March 15, 2008

the morning after

After the trigger shot on Wednesday night, there was a lot of activity in my ovaries, particularly the right one, who is a lying whore because the follicles on that side pretty much sucked as much as they blew. The left ovary is the one with the good fallopian tube, and the one I'm hoping produced at least one good egg.

Having forfeited any good drugs by canceling my IVF cycle, I'm please to report that I was in very good spirits yesterday morning, and not only because instead of starving all night before arriving at 7.15am (which, seriously, can you imagine what time I would have had to get up?!), and instead of having a needle inserted up my business and into my ovaries via my business (my god) to extract some or no eggs from my burgeoning follicles, I sauntered in at 9.15, full to the brim with coffee (decaf) and fruit salad, and had a simple procedure that involved a lot of lying down and a little vial of donor #47's finest. The best part was where I got to remain on my back with my legs in the air for a good half hour (woot) afterwards, giving me some guilt free time to appreciate the pattern on the ceiling tiles and to read old magazines that, bugger their antiquity, can still dish up some good dirt on those whacky celebs.

The other best bit was that donor sperm is washed before being frozen and ultimately thawed for insemination. In layman's terms? It looks and behaves like nothing more than few cc's of saline, so I felt nothing going in and I absolutely felt nothing going out. THANK GOD.

The donor sperm is placed close to the cervix using a "gun". It's, like, 60cm long so its primary function must be to freak the sperm recipient right out as out of the entire length of the thing, only about 7cm is inserted anyway.

Obviously designed by a man with a small peepee.


My ovaries hurt like a mofo for most of yesterday too. They settled down later in the evening and I can't feel them at all today, so hopefully there's an egg or two in there being swarmed by some very eager - and good quality -sperm. I went to the gym this morning too, which is the only place I weigh myself, and having been more than slightly freaked by the more than three kilo gain, I'm thrilled to bits that my weight is already back to normal. That'll probably change again over the next two weeks, as even if I'm not pregnant, I'll probably still bloat up and feel pregnant thanks to the How's Your Fathers I'm stashing up my clacker on a twice daily basis for the next ten days.

They're because I've been on Synarel for about three weeks, and its role is to effectively shut down the body's normal hormone production. Pregnancy requires progesterone though, great heaving piles of it, so until my own supply kicks in, that's why the supplemental stuff being delivered via my underbits.

Fun times.

And times where there's nothing more to do but wait.

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