Wednesday, August 08, 2007


My dressings come off at 2.30 today and for that, I am truly thankful. That patch of human across both cheekbones hasn't seen either the light of day or soap and water for nine (NINE!) days - and I'm SO FREAKIN' looking forward to washing my hair under the shower and without having to bend my head back so far I get vertigo in a futile effort to keep water off my face.

Yesterday was Orthodontist Day, and it's all systems go there too. Relief much? Hell yes. I was convinced he was going to tell me my teeth were too old and fragile to band, so when he said we can do this this and this and that, I about pashed him off right there. That's the good news, the bad news is that since my initial quote from three (3!) years ago was, uh, quoted, the cost of banding has gone up almost a hundred percent. The other good news is that, apart from being able to straighten my teeth in the first place which, woot! it's not an upfront payment dealio and I get to sell random body parts as needed so I can pay for appointments as I go. What thsi all means though, is that I've come full circle and the last part of this whole "we will rebuild" bizzo has fallen into place and in two or so months I'll be a metal mouth. Going to the orthodontist three years ago is what started this whole surgical dealio journey, and now I'm back in his rooms to finish it up. Maybe I should have pashed him? You know, to mark the poignant moment or something.

Let it be known though, that I'm still pretty fucking peeved that I've got to do all this ridiculous (expensive!) stuff NOW because had my parents NOT been too lazy and cheap to send me to an orthodontist IN THE FIRST PLACE, it would have been a weeny little case of move that tooth here and, presto chango and ta da!

And it's little wonder I can't get a less crummy, more informative entry written. Daniel keeps taking off his shoe and sock (left foot only) and wandering around saying "do? suh?" like a little homeless man wanting to be redressed. So redress we do, and have done about fifty jillion times.

His other new game is to stuff things in the printer and then look at me while saying "OH DOH!", his eyes wide open, his hand clapped over his O shaped mouth, "wad ee wa wad ee wa ooh?". Translation? "Oh no!! What are we going to do?!" as apparently random toy is "stuck" and as I'm the goose that went along with this cute (once) game in the first place, we have to count "wundoowee!!" before I can whip the toy out of the space so order is restored. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.


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