balls

News just in:

Stuttgart. Tuesday, 27th June, 2006.

An Australian man has been arrested in Stuttgart after assaulting an Italian supporter following the Italy / Australia knock-out match on Monday.

The man was said to be 20 metres away from his victim who sustained head fractures, several broken ribs, a punctured lung, two broken legs, severe lacerations and burns to 75% of his body.

The Australian man was shot dead by Authourities and the Italian victim is expected to make a full recovery in a couple of minutes.

Bwah!

*ahem*

As an Italian-Australian, the lead up to the game on Monday night presented a moral quandary that beat the shit out of that in Sophie's choice. Choose your favorite child? Sure! I had to choose my favorite country, fercrisake. An entire nation, and I had to do this because god knows, that nation winning or losing depended on how loud I could shout my support from the sidelines. Or from the comfort of my sofa over here on the other side of the world. Whatever, but anyway, the point is, it was tough. TOUGH! So I decided to fuck this team spirit bullshit and think less globally because that way, no matter who won, I won, and my quality of life is totally dependant on some anonymous guys with pretty hair winning a game that involves running around after each other under the guise chasing a piece a ball in what amounts to a really, really big backyard winning, I needed to win.

In case you missed it, I just made reference to my belief that all men are latent homosexuals, and that one need only look at ball (ball! hehe) sports if they have any doubts that what I say is true.

So anyway, whoever won didn't matter to me, because either way I couldn't lose.

Fuck a duck though man, the way that match ended, both teams were robbed of their chance at an honest win. And that's my contraversial statement for the day. Point being, I lost, and the World Cup is so obviously all about me. Yeah.

But!

On a personal level, there was a very silver lining, despite losing a match that had appeared to be a guaranteed win for this Australitalian bee

At around about 12.30am, I got a message on my phone, and when I opened it, it was from my brother, asking me if I was watching THE game. I wasn't, because I was watching the final episodes of season two's OC, which O. My. God! so kind of forgot that THE game was about to start. So I promptly changed stations and sent back a text message saying well, duh, of course I am. Then we had a little text message exchange about this and that, which on any other day with any other person I would've hated to do because, no thankyou, I'd rather not, but on this occasion it absolutely thrilled me to bits because my brother and I have barely spoken in almost twenty years, so I'm not going to quibble about how he approached me, I'm just going to be ridiculously happy that he did.